On March 5, 2009, 12 year-old Brett D’Andrea lost his father to a five-year battle with pancreatic cancer.  D’Andrea says that the loss of his father taught him to value the important things in life like love, family, and friendship.

            D’Andrea’s father was the late David D’Andrea.  For five years, D’Andrea, his mother, and his four younger brothers watched and prayed for the recovery of their father.  Then on a sunny Friday afternoon, D’Andrea came home to a house full of somber family members.  D’Andrea’s father had gone through so much chemotherapy and medications that his liver had shut down.  He passed away at age 53 and left a wife and four sons all under the age of 12 behind. 

            D’Andrea said that his father’s wake was when he realized what had actually happened.  “I knew I was only 12 years old,” D’Andrea said.  “But as men walked through the line everyone was telling me I was now the man of the house.  Obviously, I was not capable of running a household but I was the oldest boy and responsible for keeping my brothers and myself in line.”  That is still what D’Andrea does seven years later.  “My dad’s death forced me to grow up a lot sooner than most people.”

            “Raising four boys was not easy for my mother,” D’Andrea says.  “We are always fighting about something.  Whether it is what’s for dinner or who is on whose team in basketball, we were always giving her unneeded stress.  However, she always had support from her two sisters and now has support from her boyfriend.” 

            D’Andrea says his mother’s boyfriend, Tom, who she met four years after his father’s death, has really helped his mother and brothers out.  Between Tom and the boys’ uncle, Uncle William, the D’Andrea boys have always had a male figure to look up to.  “My younger bothers, David and Thomas, have trouble remembering my dad because they were so young,” D’Andrea said.  “I hope that they can look up to my Uncle William and Tom as role models.” 

            D’Andrea says his father had a very dry sense of humor that he will not forget.  He recalled of moments when his dad would be getting ready for work in the bathroom.  “My brothers and I would knock on the door,” D’Andrea said.  “My dad would respond back with, ‘I am outside.’  Obviously he wasn’t outside but to little kids we would believe him and leave him alone.  Looking back it makes me laugh.”

            “He was a very generous person,” D’Andrea said about his dad.  D’Andrea recalls how his father would always help the elderly neighbors in his neighborhood.  “Our neighbor was an elderly woman named Rose.  My dad would go over her house and enjoy a glass of wine and just talk with her.”  The generosity and sense of humor is what D’Andrea misses most about his father.

            D’Andrea said his relationship with his mother was always great but he certainly gravitated toward his father a little more.  “He was my best friend,” D’Andrea said.  “He was the cool dad.  If my mom said I couldn’t have candy he would take me to CVS and buy me Sour Patch Kids.  That’s what I miss about him.”

            It gets easier day by day for D’Andrea.  Now, seven years after losing his father he says the bad memories begin to fade away and he just remembers the great time he and his father shared.  “If I could tell my dad one more thing it would of course be that I love and miss him,” D’Andrea said.  “But, more specifically I would ask him what is it like in heaven?  What is he up to?  How is he doing?”

            D’Andrea is now a sophomore at the University of Rhode Island and continues to try to make his father proud.  “I found out was important to me after my dad passed away,” D’Andrea said.  “I feel on my family and God and that’s what helped me cope with it.”